The Trekking Blog

So we survived! Hurrah! I'm sure I could write ten blogs about our time on the Annapurna Trail, but I'll try and fit it into one.
And can I just say what a beautiful place Nepal is. Snow-capped peaks towering above bamboo and rhodedendron jungle. We saw monkeys and deer and a even a wolf! I was hoping for a bear or snow leopard but no such luck. Or maybe it was best...? We also managed to spot the elusive mountain goat which took on a mythical faun-like quality. I swear Amrit, our guide, made them up most of the time:
"It's there, on the mountain. By the green tree. Near the rock."
"You  just described the whole country...and it DOESN'T EXIST!!"
But him and our porter Krishna, were great. Even with all our stuff Krishna was miles ahead. Amrit stayed behind to make sure we didn't fall off the mountain. I felt we held him up, not that he showed it. But he talked incessantly to keep us going: Kirsty on the uphill, me on the down. As ever wifey and I are yin and yang. And yes, it turns out I'm afraid of walking down stairs. Must be latent fear from falling downstairs so much in normal life. Or from falling out of the top bunk when I was 2. Anyway, thanks Amrit for holding my hand. Wife didn't care. She skipped down.
Injury proved a  great equalizer however. We both fell in the snow and got identy-knee twists. Slowed Miss Green right down. She won't mind me saying she looked like a geriatric because it's true. I was of course already on pain/fear speed. Every time I had to negotiate a particularly large step down I looked like a penguin preparing to make the leap off an iceberg.
However slow we were though, we were still quicker than Holland, two guys who we passed several times and who taught us card games, tricks and riddles on the way. It's not a race....but it is and WE WON!! Bam!
During the journey we walked through the seasons. Autumn to winter to spring. The higher we got the colder and more snowy it became. The reverse on the way down made me feel like one of the Pevensie children when Narnia is thawing. Magical.
And all kinds of weather came our way. Lucky for us it was mainly sunny: a particular blessing on the day we climbed Poon Hill to see the sun rise over twenty mountains. That is the most amazing thing I've ever seen. That and the tea and coffee stand that greeted us at the summit. All mountains should have tea at the top...what a motivator.
Later we walked through an enchanted forest with frozen rivers and waterfalls made of ice. A good day.
The following day brought thunderstorms and lots of rain. I like a good thunderstorm, they are satisfyingly majestic. But we did not have raincoats because it turns out we are some of the most unprepared trekkers ever. Instead we bought big plastic sheets to cover us for the day. It looked like we were pretending to be superheroes. Rain chic. So we spent the day seeing only the inside of our turquoise wrapping, and hearing only the swish swish of it moving.
This was also the day that we had to edge nervously across a landslide. Don't look down. Don't look down.
Snow was of course the other kind of weather as we got closer to Base Camp. It was -15° by the time we reached the top. Still sunny so of course yours truly managed to burn her face, even with factor 50. How is this possible? Or fair?
But the good weather made for stunning views as we walked, and fell over, to our goal. It was like walking through a photograph...you couldn't quite believe you were there.
At the top we celebrated with Toblerone and a photo of the highest spoon ever. Obviously.
The morning that we were due to start our descent, we woke up to see an avalanche happening in the valley we had to walk through. Errrrrrmmmmm!!! What now?
We waited at least 10 minutes before going anyway. But silently and mostly up to our thighs if we slipped off the path (often) or on our bums when we fell over (also often). Poor Krishna spent most of that morning picking me up.
Food was often unexpected. If you ordered jam on toast it came as French toast. Macaroni was basically canned spaghetti. Mars bar roll and custard was quite a treat though. The whole room gasped and looked on in envy when it arrived.
The most famous food was Dal Bhat which all the guides and porters ate twice a day. If they weren't up and down mountains constantly that amount of food would surely give them a Big Dal Bhat.
We finished the trek with a visit to the hot springs, which included a dip in the freezing river first. Can we all congratulate Kirsty for putting in more than her big toe please. It was the major achievement of the trip. It made the springs so much warmer after, as did the whisky we brought with us.
After being submerged for a couple of hours we were clean for the first time in a week and a half. Still massively unattractive though, and wrinkly like prunes. Next time we go trekking we will remember to take razors and avoid looking like the Impulse ladies, or (contemporary dance in joke) Siobhan Davies dancers.
Afterwards we put on our brightly coloured fleecy trousers (passionkillers) to complete our look as stunning hotties.
Notes to future trekkers:
Remember to bring an iPod. A bit of Linkin Park (and 1D...thanks Harry and co.) really helps with a couple of hours climb.
Appropriate footwear helps. Dc Martin's don't work in snow. A point proved in the 15 minutes it took to push Kirsty up the first icy slope. If you find yourself in a similar position, socks over shoes works a treat.
Don't take any Ernest Hemingway to read. The challenge isn't worth it.
Don't take down jackets. They are too hot to walk in, too big to fit in bags, too annoying to carry. Hired ones shed feathers all over you so you look like a maulting chicken all the time, whether you are actually wearing them or not.
Pick up free bamboo sticks from the forest to help you walk. 4 legs are better than 2...those damn goats prove it.